Contrary to the belief of the individual who wrote '10 THINGS MEN FIND UNATTRACTIVE IN WOMEN', I actually spend less than 10% of every day trying to impress and attract men. Here, my friend Jazz and I go through each stupid point they made (together with some embarrassing 00s stock photography) and analyse why it's completely ridiculous and sexist.
Jazz: When I go out with my friends and have drinks, I do so because I am enjoying the company of my friends and the taste of the cocktails...
Tegan: Yeah, cos men *never* throw up on the street and stagger about. Also you try walking in those death-traps, buddy. You wouldn't find it easy either.
Jazz: When I raise my voice to someone, especially someone who is raising their voice towards me, I am doing so to get my point across to that individual, whether they are male or female...
Tegan: Again, this is so ridiculous - men shout too. Oh, and of course, it's because I'm on my period. Yep. Always the period. Not cos I'm just generally annoyed or anything. Cos you're being a dick.
Jazz: If one of our friends/ parents/ colleagues does something which upsets us, I promise never to bitch or moan about it, I know you hate it when us lovely little ladies turn into negative Nancys.
Tegan: This guy is clearly single.
Jazz: So we're not allowed to want to be on time?
Tegan: Again - men do this too...Being impatient is something all humans are capable of. Wait, isn't it usually the other way round, us silly women taking ages trying to choose which shoes go with which outfit? Oh get a grip.
Jazz: I may also use my aforementioned raised voice when excitedly speaking about meeting up with friends for a night out, if so I do apologise, I understand this is very irritating for you men.
Tegan: Aw, poor guys. How do they handle all that loud noise we produce? Whoops! Forgot to silence myself. I'll go back to my daily prayers now and quietly making you a sandwich.
Jazz: When I put make-up on or do my hair in a different style, I am 95% of the time doing so to please only myself/ kill time/ try out something I read in a magazine/ saw on YouTube...
Tegan: I love how the stupid stock photography picture for this one is a woman with a pixie cut. I bet you anything this guy was thinking "lesbian". Because obviously your hair determines your sexuality. Sorry! Sometimes we're changing OUR appearance, for you know, OURselves.
Jazz: Believe it or not, us women actually lie too. I understand this is bad and that men never do it so I really have nothing more to say on this point. On behalf of the entire female population, I apologise.
Tegan: Spot on, really. Definitely a silly thing only us women do. What are we like.
Jazz: I am also deeply regretful for the fact that I sometimes think I have a valid point which may be superior to yours, it's like I think I can do whatever I want or something which is just ridiculous. Sorry, I think I was just having a mood swing here. I am completely incapable of controlling myself during that time of the month.
Tegan: Whoops! It seems that I have, again, strayed from keeping quiet and being seen and not heard! Also can we just take a minute for this guy's Neanderthal language? "When woman act like..." Did he even check this back before publishing it?
Jazz: On the rare occasion that I decide to make an effort for the special man in my life by dressing up and then popping to the shops to pick up supplies to make his favourite meal, remind me to get changed before going. Wouldn't want to be an 'Attention (W)Horde', would I?
Tegan: Sorry for enjoying sports, as well. And sorry that the team I support is beating yours - no need to act like I'm not a real fan, just cos you're butthurt over your team losing.
Don't think this really needs comment, to be honest. "Like washing dishes". Really?! We'll get back in our cages now... Once we've washed your dishes, of course. Love, your servants xxx
This article was only published 6 months ago. WHY DO PEOPLE STILL THINK LIKE THIS? Plus it does sort of make men look bad, because obviously not all men think like this.
** And before you ask, yes we have read this: http://news-hound.org/unattractive-in-men/ and these are still our views **
Tegan and Jazz xo